Trust But Verify

January 5th, 2013

(It’s been a while since I wrote a hundred-word story.  Here’s hoping that the next one comes along a little sooner.)

“I said I was sorry!”

“Great. You’re sorry. Meanwhile, I am starting to like the taste of flies. Figure out the problem and change me back, pronto. My skin is drying out.”

My lab partner hopped back into the sink full of cool water. Large, bulging eyes stared accsuingly.

“Is this one of your incantations or did you get it from a grimoire?”

“One of mine.”

“And you didn’t test it?”

“I ran it through the validator.”

“I ran it through the validator,” she repeated mockingly. “How many times have I told you not to rely on the spell checker?”

Nom Nom Boom

October 7th, 2012

I need another cake pan like I need another hole in my head, I know. But when I saw this one, I couldn’t resist. Mostly because when I saw it, my first thought was, “Oh, how cute…pumpkins, leaves and…grenades?”

Cake pan with shapes for pumpkins, leaves, and grenades. I mean acorns. Definitely acorns.

Taste This, It’s AWFUL

July 6th, 2012

One of my coworkers is trying to up her protein intake, and tried a new product. The “strawberry kiwi” flavor apparently tastes like ASS!!!!. Not just ass, but ASS!!!! She told me all about it as she tried to resurface her tongue. just to put things in context, she thinks the beet juice our project manager occasionally brings in tastes like dirt, and yet finds it preferable to the protein powder. Probably because the beet juice, while slightly crunchy because of the pulp, at least does not have the same texture as blown-in insulation. But she is ever the optimist. Hence the following conversation:

Her: I have no beet juice
Me: I can fix that— at least it will taste like dirt instead of ass.
Her: LOL. I broke out the Ass just a few minutes ago. Still tastes bad.
Me: I cannot imagine why you think that it would taste any different today
Her: overnight fermentation?
Me: It’s DRY
Her: It could have spawned something
Me: In which case we should call Ghostbusters, not DRINK it.

Close Encounters of the Furred Kind

June 19th, 2012

That’s my brother in the Scrat suit!! He’s been hired for the publicity tour, not the live show, but still got a trip to London (where the premiere video was shot) out of the deal. Apparently, Michael Curry is familiar with Kazum, the acrobatics troupe my brother works with, and was looking for someone “short and physical” to fit in the suit for pre-show promo work.

All In Good Time

June 12th, 2012

I am pleased to announce that Jennifer Midkiff, of Wild Mercy and Alair will be having a CD release party at our place on 6/21 at 6:30ish for her new solo CD, All In Good Time. Come and hear her awesome new music live and in person! Email me for location information or leave a comment below.

Laundrocat

June 3rd, 2012

Laundrocat washes…
Washer Cat
…and dries
Dryer Cat

I Don’t Know What It Is, But I Want To Try It

May 13th, 2012

A recipe for shawarma, given to me by one is a prince among men, if not the SCA. Our gaming group devoured most of a batch last night (we had to save room for cake).

This recipe is scaled for a total of  5 lbs ground meat.

3 parts ground beef

2 parts ground lamb

1/2 large onion

most of a bunch of parsley

most of a bunch of cilantro

most of a bunch of green onions

2-4 T Penzey’s Turkish seasoning

1-2 t Aleppo pepper

1-2 T salt

1 C dry couscous

4 eggs

1-2 t ground pepper

Combine all of the above, form into oval patties that will fit into half of a round of pita bread, and fry in olive oil. Serve with pita bread and yogurt sauce (below).

More yogurt than you think you need

To taste, add salt, minced cucumber, minced onion, pepper, and garlic

Progress, of a Sort

April 23rd, 2012

Now that the technical difficulties with the home network are…well, worked around, if not resolved, I am finally able to get back on line.

So.

I have been working out semi-regularly (a little more semi than I’d like, but it’s not an ideal world) and I am seeing results. I keep having to add weights to my resistance workouts. My cardio workouts are definitely getting easier. I have actually maxed out an elliptical machine (resistance AND incline simultaneously at maximum settings). My biceps have developed to the point where there are clothes I can’t fit into because the sleeves are too tight. I felt amazingly strong in yoga class yesterday.

My weight, however, remains steady as a rock. To which I say “meh”. Muscle weighs more than fat, so I will consider it a fair trade. Eventually, things will sort themselves out. In the mean time, I am going to keep doing what I’m doing. It’s good enough for now.

 

 

This Photo Has Not Been Altered

March 9th, 2012

I’m not good at keeping the refrigerator clean or well organized. But every now and again, Spouse asks me to do something about it. The thing is, we have different definitions of what it means to clean out the fridge.

Spouse’s definition is to throw out the expired stuff.

When I clean out the fridge, I take everything out, clean the inside, clean the shelves, and get rid of everything that is expired, unrecognizable, or developed its own civilization. The fact that we did not discover this difference until we had been married for over three years should be an indicator of how often I do my version of cleaning out the fridge.

So by some miracle, we recently had a day with no time-dependent plans, no headaches, and a reasonable amount of energy. And we cleaned out the fridge (my definition) together. Et voila!

My fridge, only clean and organized

My fridge, only better

I was so proud of myself I sent the picture to a friend who is also a frequent visitor and has had to contend with my fridge on more than one occasion.

Me: You would never guess this was my fridge.

A: Anything is possible with Photoshop.

Everyone Move Down One Chair, I Want a Clean Cup

March 9th, 2012

Me: Why does the “National Tea Party” keep sending me email?

Work Twin*: Because you drink sooooooooooooooooooo much tea.

Me: I would expect the Republic of Tea to be spamming me if that were the case.

*Some people have a work spouse. I have a work twin.