Off Key
For reasons which aren’t important, Ed and I need a key to his brother’s house. Now, that same house used to be Ed and Mark’s parents’ house, and Ed lived there for several years after finishing college, so he never returned the key.
No problem, I thought. We’ll just let ourselves in. But, being the careful person that I am, I asked Ed to make sure he still had the key. That led to the following exchange:
Ed: I don’t know.
Me: Please find out ASAP and let me know so that I can pick one up if you don’t have it.
Ed: Honey, the only way to know for sure is to go over there and try the 20 or so keys I can’t identify on my chain. We may need to find another way.
Me: Didn’t it used to be your housekey…for years?
Ed: A key looks like a key looks like a key. They don’t move. They aren’t good to eat. They aren’t dangerous, and you can’t have sex with them… why in the world would I pay attention to what it looked like? Hmmm?
I don’t even know where to start answering that question.
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April 29th, 2004 at 5:02 pm
Hmm… while I don’t necessarially agree with the reasoning, I agree with the outcome. The problem with mass produced keys is that they all look the same - after the extended pet sitting spree last summer I had three extra keys on my chain, all of which looked EXACTLY identical (down to the name of the hardware store that made them) except for the actual notches in the key. I usually keep track of my keys by their position on the keychain, which means that if I haven’t used it in more than a month or two, I often have to find it the hard way. But then again, I never let my key chain accumulate to 20 either.